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Adriene Macedo has some cool artwork and a fabulous lingerie collection. I am a fan. More to come.
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Faina Bona lights up the National Library with a more-than-competent photographer in Latvia. Every week, I get contacted by someone somewhere asking if they can be paid to do my job. The answer is always yes--as long as they can find women like Faina to shoot. Contributors must also agree that to be called a pervert is hardly an insult.
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You wanna bring peace to Europe, but can you bring peace to your life? Can you put down your phone long enough to play outside with your children for an hour? Can you cancel the business trip to Costa Rica and stay home with your family instead? Do you have the internal strength to resist Armando, your secret lover, and his warm embrace? The wife knows. She must know. Liberate yourself from the slave chains of deceit and suck Truth's dick like tomorrow isn't guaranteed. Stella Barry is stunning. Thanks, Anthony. But maybe next time cool it with the playgrounds.
Guys, I feel that I have misled you in some way and I am tired of carrying around all this guilt. I must make a shocking confession. I am trans. I was born a female. I wore dresses, played with dolls, tortured kittens, you know, everything that little girls normally do. But something never felt right. I began getting interested in trucks and math and even started fantasizing about my teenage babysitter, Jessica. I wanted to do everything that boys did, I wanted to eventually pleasure women in the ways only men could--the dick, the balls, the large bank account. I needed it all. So after third grade, I made the leap. I started taking hormone blockers and surgically transitioned to becoming a man. I have to say, it was the best decision that I ever made as a child. God bless Portland and Patsy Ford.
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If my memory serves me correctly, but usually it does not, Cindy White had an ultra-Christian upbringing. Her father grew up in Montana. As a boy, he idolized his favorite Sunday preacher for delivering the most powerful and heartfelt sermons. Jacob began to think that his future also lied in clergy. But God had other plans. A summer job at a local car dealership developed into a short career as the slimiest salesman you could ever meet. Jacob ended up impregnating the dealership's receptionist, who was already unhappily married to her alcoholic and closeted high school sweetheart, and the two decided to start a new life together in Bakersfield. They bore an attractive daughter and subjected her to extreme sexual repression post-puberty. This of course had the opposite desired effect and Cindy's curious nature erupted the moment she was able to hitchhike her way to Los Angeles. However, religion proved a hard habit to kick and Cindy was compelled to find herself a church, as luck would have it, the very same one located around the corner from my go-to dispensary. I can spot a gem hiding in any congregation. Stay ready.
Even though science, my wife's advice, and personal experience has taught me to avoid refined sugar and food coloring, I doubt that I have consumed my last Eegee's frozen fruit drink. They are a source of nostalgia. When I moved to Tucson for college, it was the first thing that alleviated me from the desert heat. The U of A handed out large complimentary samples at their new student orientation and I immediately became a fan. Same thing for Brandy Gila, her chill vibes are addictive.
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WARNING! The man in the header photo of this update is a bonafide killer, as in buzz-killer. I assume he is the manager of this particular Publix supermarket, although we were not shown any official credentials. Guy walked right up to us and rudely asked us to leave the store. This injustice must not go unheard. Sasha was merely exercising her rights to free speech and sexual empowerment. Men like him want to silence the women's movement. Maybe he would like to see Sasha in a burka? Disgusting. Sponsored by Sprouts.
When you ask a woman if she is hungry and she says, a little, then you better get some food quick! The answer is never a simple, yes. It is usually something like, mother fucker why didn't you get me food when I said I was hungry?, referring to when she said a little. More of my profound insight and more of the extra-tasty Vonnie Bean to come. Shout-out to Bianchi's in Tucson. Bye Bye.
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