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I have been doing this a long time. I know how to push all your buttons. I can predict all your immediate reactions. I know what you are saying in your head. No way. Not possible. Gotta be fake. But nope. You are absolutely wrong, my dude. I made sure to check thoroughly in person. They are not contact lenses. And Vyeta Mustafina's entire face is completely natural. As for the rest of her body, I remain a skeptic. But who knows? She says it's legit. Who cares? In five years, you will be happily married to some A.I. octopus elf in the metaverse.
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Kurt Cobain was a pussy. He let us nineties-kids down. The new generation, like the one Vonnie Bean is part of, has a laundry list of profound issues to resolve and with the guidance of mostly talentless heroes. The apocalypse is right around the corner and the kids are still smiling, dancing, and making TikTok videos. They might be idiots, but I still enjoy them more than the idiots my age. The ones whose lives are dictated by mortgages, political affiliations, and favorite sports teams. Today's adults don't want the kids using drugs, making porn, or hurting anyone's feelings. Instead they offer what? Participation Trophies? An endless psychotic nightmare permeated by government surveillance and personalized advertising? Maybe Kurt was onto something. But he still is a pussy. Vonnie took an outdoor leak for the first time in the bonus video.
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Here is the second part of my idyllic morning with Jezebel. There will be a part three that continues in her bedroom, but that will drop much later. Don't worry. It will be worth the wait. And remember, I am always available to photograph your beautiful wild friendloversistercousinmother whenever she is ready to be admired by thousands. Have a great weekend.
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"Here's an extensive throwback to when Liz Jordan and I went to the Alamo during COVID. In a way, it was a major bust since the monument was closed down for renovation. But in all other ways, it was good times. Liz's dress kept flashing her top wherever we went. We almost cared, then we remembered that Texas loves titties."
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When I shoot, I am mostly trying to create both pretty and interesting pictures. I am trying to highlight what I find appealing about my subject, but I'm also trying to build a relatable fantasy for my audience. I want to bring them into worlds that are not easily accessible. I want to showcase wild personalities and special moments in time. I want to inspire, entertain, and give people, mostly men, a feeling of acceptance for their instinctual nature. I want to share my humor at these absurd biological conditions we live in. But most importantly, I want to make a dollar, because my wife's tastes get more goddamn expensive every single year. So subscribe and enjoy!
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It took some doing, but Bea Wolf agreed to venture outside in this dress, which is more like a top that one would wear with shorts or leggings underneath. I showed some mercy and limited the revealing attire to low-traffic locations such as a stranger's front yard. Bea is a pensive sweetie who has her shy moments, but obviously also enjoys tasting life on the wild side. Henry Jerome's Oh, Pretty Woman plays in the bonus video.
"Daphne Dare invites us into her quiet, pink chambers for this intimate session. Her room is filled with all things girly, including a cat, sewing machine, countless stuffies, a large bottle of coconut rum, and mandatory massage wand. I could tell right away that this was her safe space, its own little world that she doesn't regularly share with just anyone. Thanks, Daphne. Part 2 tomorrow."
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Comet Nox returns with her old cheerleading uniform from high school. She recently repurposed it as a Halloween costume. I can only hope that this is what the zombie apocalypse will look like. We visit her backyard where Comet kills it on the trampoline. She warned me that excessive bouncing has its affect on her bladder. I don't mind. Maybe others will, but maybe they need to get back in touch with nature.
"It has been winter in Argentina for the last few months, but that doesn't mean our contributors there have been in hibernation. Here is another delightful adventure with familiar face, Zoe Aguilar and her new friend, Emma Velazquez. Zoe has had so much fun shooting for us that she talked Emma into joining the team. Which flavor would you pick? Part two on the way."
Let us return to Russia with our contributor, Vika, and her modelfriend, Arina Bik. On this cloudy day in Moscow, they take us shopping and out for a bit of adventurous street flashing. Now, perhaps I did jump the gun by investing my life savings into Bitcoin last year. But my children seem bright enough. They should be able to make it through life without expecting a terrific inheritance. Even if Bitcoin's price is in the dumps, it remains the ideal way to transmit monetary value to a person living under a corrupt regime, i.e. everyone living on Earth. Better than nothing.
"Here is the conclusion of our day with Irina Dyvyn and Bianca Bell. If you enjoy women being comfortable and playful and unpressured, you will probably dig this update. Alina, our contributor, has a talent for making her subjects feel relaxed and willing to be completely candid. Her work brings us along for the ride. After 8 minutes of the 13-minute video, you will only be able to understand the dialog if you speak Russian. Mostly, Bianca talks about her office job, the Russian/Ukranian language issue, and how tech guys are odd. Have a great weekend."
"Another candid look into one of our contributor productions. We hear Stacy's voice (in Spanish) as you get a 5-minute, fly-on-the-wall view of a Zishy shoot."
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This is the first time that I hire a female contributor to take two models out for photos. If you recall, we met Rosa and Zaheera last year in their own solo updates. The real life friends gave Zishy a try on a whim and despite what you may think are almost twenty years old--each, not combined! The photographer that shot them solo, Dan, was eviscerated in a freak hot tub accident, so I had Viky travel to their city to continue the magic. More of these Colombian beauties planned.
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"Our contributor in Colombia has this friend that is super photogenic but was dating this really jealous dickhead who would never share his gf with the internet. Vicky, the contributor, was able to capture these a while back, but had agreed not to use them until Maya's toxic relationship was over. Looks like we are in the clear now. Juan, find someone else to terrorize ... or grow up. My vote is for the latter. Part 2 very soon."
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At some point, we need to tell these assholes, to whom we give a significant part of our paychecks to, that they can all hit the bricks. They fuck with our environment, our health, our safety, our children's futures. They even fuck with our pathetic existence on the goddamn Internet. Not cool, bros. At some point, we need to grow a pair and say enough is enough. They can't come after us all if nobody complies. Death to the broken system. Despite everything, Trista Jakes still has the ability to put a smile on my face. Our move. Let me know when you are ready.
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Is it me or have you noticed that only nutty people make claims that they have been gaslighted? Beware of anyone making such accusations. Here is Chaney Gunn taking me on a hike at dusk near her home in Texas. There was not much available light, but I discovered that not much light is needed to show the undeniable beauty of Chaney. The glasses and red lumberjack pattern remind me of Terry Richardson. Come back, Terry
Here are two fabulous women that I went above and beyond to bring to Zishy. Shyla Volbeck, the brunette, is very kind and approachable despite her intimidating beauty. Moon Torrance is ultra-confident in herself and outspoken with her views. Both could work in the seedy underworld of the fashion industry if they were so inclined. Luckily, we can see them be more than mannequins pushing absurdly priced products here at Zishy.
She is a really nice person and I am a very lucky photographer. Aurora Morgenrote is daring and beautiful. I will have a hard time topping this trip to Italy. I hope Europe bounces back stronger than ever after the pandemic. Stay hopeful, friends.
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Kelsey Berneray is not typical in any way, but who am I to state the obvious? Her warm smile is a reflection of the joyful personality within. She is kind, friendly, and unassuming. She also has breasts that may have left some of her previous lovers concussed. Hey, no one is perfect. Some fun is worth the CTE.
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Contestant 18 is from Texas. She is obviously a natural redhead or has me fooled completely. She admits to having her photographer friend help her with the camera, but I assured her that it was well within the rules. Is it weird that masks are starting to look sexy to me now?
Kylie Shay and her partner are pretty goddamn cool. They showed me around downtown Memphis and we ate some burgers... I think. I can't remember. I was distracted by Kylie's amazing features. The waitress that served us caught Kylie's attention, but it turns out Kylie gets shy when it comes to approaching other women. See girls, it's not so easy. Is it? Oh and in case you didn't see, I added a bonus video to Thursday's update of Meleida. Follow me on Twitter to stay up to date with Zishy news. realzishy
I meet so many incredible women when I travel and yet Nika Nikitina still stands out. She is like lighting in a bottle. And just like lighting, she is not easy to photograph. She puts on a blistering pace from the get-go. If you don't know how to operate your camera instinctually, you will be screwed. Lucky for me, I have put in the hours and know little else besides this chase. Chasing beauty--I have surrendered myself to this calling. Will probably be at it until the end, boys. Stay along for the ride.
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WARNING! The man in the header photo of this update is a bonafide killer, as in buzz-killer. I assume he is the manager of this particular Publix supermarket, although we were not shown any official credentials. Guy walked right up to us and rudely asked us to leave the store. This injustice must not go unheard. Sasha was merely exercising her rights to free speech and sexual empowerment. Men like him want to silence the women's movement. Maybe he would like to see Sasha in a burka? Disgusting. Sponsored by Sprouts.
Aria Sky wolfed down the cupcake faster than I had planned. I wanted to get a few more messy shots, maybe a video, but that chocolate goodness was screaming her name. And anyways, this leaves more sploshing ground for Zishy to cover. Since these were taken, Aria has been on hiatus from modeling. I'm not sure where she is or how she is doing, but my invitation for her to return remains open. Drown out the hate, Aria. The world will catch up.
This is an excellent summer afternoon to remember. Ophelia and I were craving heavy Mexican food along with an ice cold adult beverage. Lupe Tortilla was there to provide. We opted to dine outside for more privacy, but that was short lived and Ophelia didn't care. I asked her if she found sweat disgusting, and to my surprise, she did not. So we agreed to bring you viewers a mess of slippery shots from the parking lot. It only takes a few minutes with the engine off and the windows rolled up here in Texas. Feast on these heat shock proteins, my friends.
Here is contestant number 8 from the challenge that I ran last year. I got to meet up with Onna Metcalf in San Diego. She is quiet, but I like quiet. I wonder which of our last two American presidents would do a better job in my occupation. Would they be competent? Creative? Coherent? I am so proud of our country. God bless.
This is Julie Bernal from closer to the equator. Her boyfriend hit me up and said that she was a natural eyecatcher and was ready to be admired on Zishy. After seeing some test shots, I said I had the Bitcoin ready to make that happen. So if you have a girlfriend, friend, wife, cousin, sister, or mother like Julie, and you are not hitting me up, that is just outright cruel. Spread the happy. It's only pictures. You still get to enjoy the real thing.
Guys, tell your woman that she looks great today. Don't give her a complex about her nose, lips, curves, or lack thereof. Nobody should have to be sliced up and stuffed by some hack doctor. That old adage about health being the most important thing Is actually true. Let's all be imperfect with dignity. Let's realize that some people are simply blessed with lips like Karissa Kane. And some people can understand quantum physics. The game was never intended to be fair. Selah.
I took these photos of Myra Glasford at a shopping mall when masks were a required thing. Oh well. We still managed to flash her dangerous face from time to time. Probably ended up killing a few people in the process. Our bad. At least a few old dudes got a rise from the revealing top Myra was wearing before they met the reaper. Stay safe out there.
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It is nice that some people go to college and devote their energy towards building respectable careers. Some of which include insurance broker, government program manager, linguist, and commercial real estate agent. Then there are people like me, who come to your city and hire open-minded young women to be photographed for their smutty website. Hey, at least I made it through Sober October. Chapel Hill was nice. Fawn Richfield was nicer.
Myra Glasford returns for a late night snack. I would have taken her anywhere, but she asked for Taco Bell. I can't blame her much. There are limited options after 9pm. Myra has the enchanting aroma of bubble gum and Fritos. Reminds me of a guy we used to call Corn Pop. He loved him some Fritos. Anyhow, A girl like Myra makes me wish I was young again and could ignore all these old-people problems. I mean fuck, maaann. I am expected to lead the country when I can't even tie my shoe without getting a splitting headache. Hell, the last time I made a solid bm was at the age of seventy-seven. Where's Hunter? --J. Biden
Dear Colby Covington, I hope you are one of my readers. Zishy is Donald Trump's favorite site, aside from Twitter of course. I just wanted to thank you for entertaining me. You put your reputation on the line in so many ways. It is so refreshing to see someone accept hate as a form of love. So you came up short in the octagon last Saturday, big deal. You still gained a shitload of respect for your fighting spirit. Even being all busted up you managed to stay in character. It was truly admirable. If you ever need a tasteless sponsor, you know where to come. Hope you get a chance to work on your bedroom cardio while you heal up. Irelynn Dunham has great big freckles.
It is remarkable that Austin is the home of two of the wildest, blonde, busty adult starlets from recent memory. Though when it comes to uninhibited energy, Angel Youngs takes the blue ribbon. We went shopping. then took some pics in the parking lot. My mind was filled with thoughts like--Is this really happening? Life rips! She is the real deal. Happy Birthday, Angel.
If I disappear, it might be because of the photos I took of Sylvia Belotti. Either her or her family has hired an Italian lawyer to come at me with serious legal threats. I have two things to say. One, I know Sylvia is cool as hell, or at least she was when I met her, so it must be someone else giving her shit for agreeing to this sort of modeling. Fuck them. If anyone devalues Sylvia for being a wild person with wild appetites, then it is their loss. They lose out on Sylvia. Two, I am not easily frightened. In fact, I am quite dumb. I live in Texas and go to massive public gatherings on summer holidays. That takes guts in 2022. Part two evench.
Here is part two as promised. Lanah Adams knew what she was getting into when she took the Zishy gig. But as you can see in the bonus video, she had a moment of hesitation before baring her amazing breasts. This was one of the trickiest public shoots I have pulled off. Apparently, holiday destinations tend to draw crowds around the holidays. Go figure. Just the same, our mission was accomplished at Mission Inn. Madonna's Burning Up is the track in the bonus video.
I have lived in Santa Barbara since I was a boy, breathing in the coastal air, gazing at colorful sunsets which lingered over the Pacific Ocean. I did everything right. Went to school, got a job, got married, you know, the whole number. But these days, the world seems to be caving in on itself. The decline has always been present but felt much slower earlier in my life. And now it seems to have picked up an insane momentum. I feel so empty with everything that I do. I am constantly either on edge or feebly trying to distract myself from the horrors of our reality. Yes, OUR reality. It isn't even about me anymore. Now this is about all of us. That makes me even more sad. --discarded poem found at beach parking lot in 2018. What a pussy.
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Kim Solari is one of the most athletic women that I have ever photographed for Zishy. She plays basketball competitively. She loves the gym. She says one must always train until failure. Kim travels, speaks German, and Kim is ultra-passionate about animals, including snakes and spiders. Kim admits to looking at her muscular figure and thinking, you can't have grace with this much power. Wrong, Kim. I can still see it.
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A fan recently wrote me saying that he could help bring Chinese talent to Zishy. I was skeptical, because similar claims have gotten my hopes up in the past and then developed into squat diddly. This time though, I was not entirely disappointed. Ben was able to track down an attractive model and a competent photographer. Truth be told, this set is very light on nudity. Banana Li's wholesome demeanor is not just an act. I still appreciate the aesthetics of the photography and welcome more contributions from any locale. Perhaps we will live long enough to see a Zishy update from Mars. Dreaming is free. Happy Friday.
Alevtina Batman is one of the women that I show to potential models before a shoot. Her willingness to interact with the camera is exemplary and instinctual. She brought me to her local health food store for a quick bite. Then, Alevtina showed me around her neighborhood in Moscow. Generally, when I visit this part of the world, I am enjoying the tranquility of a small town setting. But after a while, I start to crave the anonymity and give-zero-fux mentality of a crowded city. Alevtina concurs. A natural performer like her deserves a large audience.
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Tomas has been a Zishy subscriber for years. He was inspired to invest into some professional camera gear and start taking photos. He hit me up with pics of a redhead beauty named Petrine Krahlove. Do you think she's good enough for Zishy? Yeah, man. Petrine is into skiing and heavy metal music. I would love to see her headbang with that tremendous hair. Good find and good shooting, T-bone. I hope you stick with it.
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