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Sofi Ryan makes an excellent date to a wedding. She knows how to put down the champagne, how to light up the dance floor, and how to make grandpa feel alive again below the waist. Enjoy Sofi and more importantly, enjoy your Saturday.
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Zuzanna was, at first, quite opposed to baring much for the camera. But if you make a person feel safe and beautiful, they just might lose sight of misguided cultural beliefs. Beliefs that are consistently embedded in us. Beliefs that mar our attitudes towards our bodies and sexualities in shame. Zuzanna was very generous on this day and her natural figure is difficult to fathom. She is lucky. We are lucky.
My life was a mess. I had just dropped my phone and cracked its screen. People at church were spreading gossip about the collection basket being lighter every time it passed my pew. Grandma had forgotten my name but kept asking if Ed McMahon had returned her call. Fuck. I just couldn't win. Then it happened. The lady at my neighborhood taco truck gave a gummy smile and a wink, with her good eye, as she handed me the sticky bottle of salsa fuego. The universe seemed right again. A faint mustache never hurt nobody. Let's be honest, playing with those soft, giant chi chi's would be so worth it. Nala Brooks has a strong back.
Waking up can be a pain in the butt. It does help if you have a helping hand. Kat Keen has some of the comfiest pajamas that I have ever seen. They are super convenient to slip on or off or pull to side, strangle someone withjk. What more could you ask from sleepwear? Hope you got a good start to your day as well. Keep those batteries charged.
Welcome to Better Times Cafe. We serve you women like Lana Lane who is a stunning female specimen from Ukraine. She is brought to us by our contributor, Max. Here at our establishment, we do not discuss war or politics or anything that will upset you. We do not care about those things. We care about boobs, boners, and money. That's it. Have a seat and enjoy the warm cozy environment. The human suffering that you hear outside will pass. It always does. Just relax, indulge yourself on the goodies, and remember to pay your bill before you go. Thank you! -Management
"Here is part 2. I need to add a bonus video. And I will do it either today or at the latest, tomorrow. I just have a plane to catch right now. I was in California for the last 40ish hours photographing another incredible woman for yous. Hope ya' guys are doing well. Thanks for your patience. Sonya slaps, right?"
Here is our finale with two Colombians that could blow the socks off of any hombre. I am glad that our contributor, Viky, was able to spend ample time with Rosa and Zaheera. My goal was to do justice to these young women's natural beauty and authentic friendship. It took a few tries, but it was worth the extra pesos. By the way, I'm not going to be wearing a mask again any time soon. So just go ahead and cancel or crucify me now. Thanks. httpswww.youtube.comwatch?vFK-ZyUjgFBI
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Damn, Zach. It is hella cool that you made this job for yourself. I go to work everyday, dreading existence. I have begun a gradual process of poisoning myself. As part of my daily routine, I take a dropper of hydrochloric acid and give my coffee a generous squirt. I started out only adding a drop or two, but over the past few weeks I have built up to a much higher dose. The tummy tingle is an oddly pleasant sensation. Anyways, let me know if you ever need an assistant or something, it could be a real gamechanger for me. If not, I totally understand. Perhaps you could at least introduce me to Maddie Crump. Thanks in advance. -George Tipcorn
Rose Fessenden is a sight to behold. I hope she loves these photos of her as much as I do. Enjoy the weekend and say hello to your mother for me.
I think you are going to like Rian Starber. Even with her reluctance to bare all, I still had trouble limiting this set to a hundred photos. Her natural good looks can be distracting. I ended up forgetting my bag of camera gear on the rooftop when we left. Fortunately, Rian's apartment complex is upscale enough that nobody ran off with my property. Or perhaps because this happened during COVID and everyone was too afraid to touch a strange bag. Thank COVID!
That heart of yours ain't gonna last forever. You might as well dip that fried piece of potato into the mayonnaise and savor this experience. To all of you who think that my occupation is a dream come true you are right. Partially, anyways. As with any job, there are always new challenges. Who knows how long I can do this type of shit before the every inch of the planet is being surveilled by AI. And how about risks? Nalani Dacus could have held me at gunpoint for my camera equipment. Christ, I underestimated that edible. Anyways, thanks for the memories, everyone.
So what happened is that I recently joined a cult. The leader, Cornelius, tells me that my photography is exceptional and that I should not be giving it all away for as little as I was. He had me increase prices for Zishy in order to up my contribution to the communal fund. Some of you hate me for it, but Master has spoken. What I am mostly bummed about is how my wife and teenage daughters are required to attend Master's night-long private lectures on Wednesdays and Saturdays. But as it is written, if sacrifice was easy, it would not be called sacrifice.
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