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If there's been one thing, or technically two, that has made me forget about politics, religion, finance, war, personal responsibility, my mental health--it's been large natural breasts. I have dabbled with focusing on other aspects of life, and have had some short-lived success. But let's be honest, what turns heads like an undeniable pair such as those Samadhi Amour has been graced with? Silence.
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Faina Bona lights up the National Library with a more-than-competent photographer in Latvia. Every week, I get contacted by someone somewhere asking if they can be paid to do my job. The answer is always yes--as long as they can find women like Faina to shoot. Contributors must also agree that to be called a pervert is hardly an insult.
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If my memory serves me correctly, but usually it does not, Cindy White had an ultra-Christian upbringing. Her father grew up in Montana. As a boy, he idolized his favorite Sunday preacher for delivering the most powerful and heartfelt sermons. Jacob began to think that his future also lied in clergy. But God had other plans. A summer job at a local car dealership developed into a short career as the slimiest salesman you could ever meet. Jacob ended up impregnating the dealership's receptionist, who was already unhappily married to her alcoholic and closeted high school sweetheart, and the two decided to start a new life together in Bakersfield. They bore an attractive daughter and subjected her to extreme sexual repression post-puberty. This of course had the opposite desired effect and Cindy's curious nature erupted the moment she was able to hitchhike her way to Los Angeles. However, religion proved a hard habit to kick and Cindy was compelled to find herself a church, as luck would have it, the very same one located around the corner from my go-to dispensary. I can spot a gem hiding in any congregation. Stay ready.
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Even though science, my wife's advice, and personal experience has taught me to avoid refined sugar and food coloring, I doubt that I have consumed my last Eegee's frozen fruit drink. They are a source of nostalgia. When I moved to Tucson for college, it was the first thing that alleviated me from the desert heat. The U of A handed out large complimentary samples at their new student orientation and I immediately became a fan. Same thing for Brandy Gila, her chill vibes are addictive.
Happy Fathers Day, you domesticated savages. I hope this update of Misty Lovelace makes you realize that our time in this dimension is limited. Essentially, I am writing this to nobody. Let's face it, we are all dead people walking our dead dogs, admiring the dead trees. Your countdown has begun. One subtracted from the finite number of breaths that your lungs will ever breath. Another. Get moving. You're not as flexible as you used to be.
Gaby Mueller has crazy acrobatic skills. She busted out these moves without much of a warm-up and being long out of practice. I never thought I would also be in the superhero game, but here I am. BTW, I just tested positive for being teased out of my mind by Gaby.
If you want to witness the decline of the American Empire first-hand, go visit a shopping mall or a retail box store today. These places are not long for this world. The veneer of consumerist bliss is now showing major cracks. As a celebrationcommemoration, Lila Love tried baring her crack for us at a local Target. This girl is adorable and her fake name suits her perfectly. She constantly looks like she's falling in love.
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