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I am so glad to see Dabney Conrad again. She is truly a special person. If I was to walk into her club, you know the kind filled with girls with daddy issues, I'd be expecting to meet someone totally fake and only interested in the contents of my wallet. Not so with Dabney. She is ultra-kind and authentic and loves animals so much, she'd probably just take whatever money you give her and donate it to a rescue shelter. In fact, I am positive that is what Dabney did with all my cash. I had to help her help the innocent critters. I think she really likes me too, guys.
If I had a time machine and could visit any moment in my life, I think I would relive this experience a few times. Meadow Brink is an incredible person who puts a lot of passion into everything she does. She is quirky and strange and uninhibited with her own personal history, which includes some trauma. She can be kinky, and is gifted with SUPER noteworthy genitalia. I have some bonus material from this day that I could share for a nice tip in my jar. Email me for details. Stay weird.
Yeah it is brisk, but you are gonna warm up. I promise. These winter chills in LA are nothing compared to other places. Do some cartwheels. Try some headstands. We just gotta get your heartrate up. You don't need that jacket. You're the descendent of savages, Melba. Don't forget that. Savages. I think I can see the stars in your yoga pants. Damn, this adrenaline is lovely.
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Tea is great. I don't know if it will have the same effect that you see here on all Russian women, but then again, all Russian women are not Jia Lissa. As soon as she opened the door, I knew I was in for an endurance race. Jia's energy is seemingly boundless. She throws magic at a photographer until they tap out. Luckily for us, I have put in my road work this season.
Here is a bonus to the latest Naomi Woods update. Go ahead and crucify me for the low image count, this is just a bonus. Go ahead and complain that Naomi's candor regarding her drug use is a big turnoff, but hey, whose youth wasn't misguided and full of mistakes? We win or we learn. Even at my ripe age, I am still doing my share of learning. Happy 420, you filthy animals.
I have been doing this a long time. I know how to push all your buttons. I can predict all your immediate reactions. I know what you are saying in your head. No way. Not possible. Gotta be fake. But nope. You are absolutely wrong, my dude. I made sure to check thoroughly in person. They are not contact lenses. And Vyeta Mustafina's entire face is completely natural. As for the rest of her body, I remain a skeptic. But who knows? She says it's legit. Who cares? In five years, you will be happily married to some A.I. octopus elf in the metaverse.
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Some asshole told me that this land used to be Mexico, and before that, something else. Come on, guy. I popped out of a vagina on this side of the river. Therefore, I have earned the right to keep you and your hungry children out. Stop ruining my zen vibes. For those that are humorless, please Bing 'sarcasm'. One of Carlin's great jokes, They call it the American dream because you have to be asleep to believe it. I thought it would be hard to convince Wendy Patton to undress completely and walk around in the baking desert. But Wendy likes to prove me wrong. We have a peculiar relationship.
Hair is so nasty. It gets stinky, dirty, itchy, sweaty. Yuck! Shave it all off. Wax it. Have it removed by laser. In fact, skin is also pretty gross. Don't just stop at the follicles, peel that lemon. The new standard in style is bone and some functional muscle. This is what now defines a civilized human being in today's world. Don't get stuck in the past like Desiree Jacobsen. She might look happy and comfortable, but we all really know what's going on. Barbarism.
Neda Marie had no problem gambling and taking risque photos with me in Las Vegas. This beautiful young woman has been against the odds since her childhood, but she keeps smiling. We can look at each other and focus on our differences or we can acknowledge the immense common ground we share. Most people on Spaceship Earth just want safety, love, and a little fun before their time is up. There are so many more interesting things to do than hate.
Back when I was growing up, being weird was a lot easier than it is now. These days, tattooing your eyeballs or going out dressed up as a raccoon will barely even register as being odd. But hey, I can dig it. I am comfortable with the new generations and their new ways. I don't expect traditional ideas of normal when a performative virtualized existence meets legalized psychotropics. Venus is a unique blend of this new world with loads of classic natural beauty. Moar to come.
Enjoy this short followup to my visit to the Hindu temple with Georgia Ames. She is friendly and wild, which is unlike the people who run that place. They were all butt-hurt about me taking pictures on their property. Legal threats ensued and subsequently ignored. What's so dirty about the human body and sexuality? Guess I need to become religious to find out.
Camila Gomez is a nice person and it makes life so much easier when you get to deal with nice people. I would also say that I enjoy life more when I am nice to people. And that's why when people talk trash in the comments or online, I keep scrolling. My time here is limited and it can't be wasted on mean thoughts towards mean people. I know that I am no angel, but I also know that I don't have any dead bodies in my trunk. I hope Camila is doing well and I hope your 2023 is better than 2020 through 2022. Peace, ninjas.
"Just yesterday, I found a scorpion on the street. I had to stop and admire this creature. Scorpions know that they are beautiful and they let you know it too, but not with a smile—never a smile. Smiles are for the weak. Scorpions are strong and dangerous and can hide their power in silence. When they approach, their perfume coils around your head like a noose. You only become aware of a scorpion's stinger at the moment it is too late—the moment after you have fallen in love. Please heed my advice, treat the scorpions in your life well or stay clear of them completely. Happy Friday."
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Dear Colby Covington, I hope you are one of my readers. Zishy is Donald Trump's favorite site, aside from Twitter of course. I just wanted to thank you for entertaining me. You put your reputation on the line in so many ways. It is so refreshing to see someone accept hate as a form of love. So you came up short in the octagon last Saturday, big deal. You still gained a shitload of respect for your fighting spirit. Even being all busted up you managed to stay in character. It was truly admirable. If you ever need a tasteless sponsor, you know where to come. Hope you get a chance to work on your bedroom cardio while you heal up. Irelynn Dunham has great big freckles.
Happy Fourth. Dita Vetone is super picky about the food she eats, but she humored me and tasted a chunk of fried alligator tail from my plate. To me, the gator was fantastic. But what the hell do I know? I was sitting there, half love-drunk with the exceptional creature across the table. She might not show it all, but she will still floor your jaw. Stay tuned for part two.
The church lady told Ulyana that she was not dressed appropriately to enter the house of God. So we respectfully snapped a few pics outside of the sacred room. Ulyana demonstrated how women are to have their hair covered when they are inside worshiping. This makes sense since hair is evil. I am glad mine is quickly departing my pate. Have you ever noticed that the first three commandments are essentially the first rule of Fight Club? A forbiddance of murder only makes it to number six on the list. And I know everyone is talking politics these days. Let me just remind you of the old saying, "If voting made a difference, they wouldn't let us do it."
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"Part 1, so save the hate mail. When a beautiful woman offers to pick you up at the airport and drive you to her place in small-town Pennsylvania, you jump. I did. I documented the experience in the most raw manner possible. Jezebel is heroically bold and honest with who she is, which is perfect. I photographed like a maddman that night. Xtra, video, etc. Stay tuned."
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Hello, everyone. Just because Zishy is rated the number one internet site by the Douglas Peabody Foundation, doesn't mean that I can afford to send myself into space. No, I am a simple man of simple means. My only plans for the future are to explore the bottom of the oceans with a robotic submarine. While I'm working on that, I might have more people like Andy, our Colombian contributor, photograph women like Yma Pallete. Hope that's cool. See you soon.
I think of candy as immediate gratification, not food. Porn for the taste buds if you will. Oddly enough, I never took much interest in it. I prefer my thrills to come in the shape of a woman. A woman's acceptance and approval. If you want candy and you're a woman, and candy brings you satisfaction, chances are that I'm gonna find a way to get some. Perhaps that makes me an automaton devoid of free will. There's not much I can do about it at this point. Part 2 soon.
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Introducing Gaby Mueller. She loves running. She loves Eeyore. She has a hunger for adventure that surfaces spontaneously. That lump in your throat, that feverish sensation on your skin, do not panic, it is not the coronavirus. These are the effects of an incredible woman teasing the snot out of you. Gaby does an even better job of it in person. As for the recent chaos that has rapidly developed, I know you come to Zishy for distraction, for relief, for guidance =P. I only have the wisdom of Eeyore to impart. “The nicest thing about the rain is that it always stops. Eventually.”
It was nice to get to Austin and work with Kelsey Berneray again. It might surprise you to know that she is often nervous in a public setting, and not even when she is in front of a camera. Some men do not particularly appreciate large breasts. There always seems to be an exception to the rule, but that does not negate the rule. During the process of this shoot, Kelsey made a man rev his powerful motor, and another to kindly offer his commercial truck as a backdrop. Women rule.
Noelle Monique is guilty as charged. She loves getting into trouble. I went up to Corona, California to photograph her. She yanked out this absurd dress from her closet and I fell in love. Noelle showed me her favorite poke place, if you don't know what poke is, do yourself a favor and look into it. It is like a deconstructed sushi roll in a bowl. We took some shots on the streets and then at some sort of appliance store. It is confirmed, Noelle is stunning in any environment.
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One of the most important lessons that my mentor imparted to me was never to assume that anyone I meet is actually who they say they are. We'll slide down the surface of things. Sometimes, I even convince myself that my own bullshit is real. I eat healthy, I am a mature person, I make smart decisions--all things that I believe as I stuff my face with greasy nachos and photograph a woman flashing me her breasts at a crowded restaurant in Arizona. Oh, well. At least my lifestyle has afforded an opportunity to meet hundreds of wild, attractive individuals like Rebel Tee. And at least I am let in on some of their secrets.
So I'm listening to Nervous Norvus and thinking to myself, Yeah, I can do this. I can start dicking around with some musical instruments and audio recording software and make a few quirky tracks. I have been taking Alpha Brain and am ready to focus on mastering a new craft. I will pair catchy melodies with witty lyrics that poke fun at the meaninglessness of existence. I will put them on the Internet and they can go viral. Maybe in a couple of years I will be asked to perform on the festival circuit. I will have to abandon my family, but great things require great sacrifice. However, first, I must add a bonus video and an 'xtra' content update of Melody Marks by tomorrow. The launch of my next career can wait a few more days.
I know that most of you are here for my financial advice. You wanna learn how to roll up like a big G in a tricked out Honda Accord. Look, I get it. Here's what you do. Borrow 5 large from your mom's boyfriend and invest into Zishcoin. The gains will be massive. Let's face it, you are not going to be getting a job any time soon and that whole iPad repair business idea you had is never gonna pan out. Actual work is so Old World. You want easy money and this is where Zishcoin comes in. I am opening up the ICO to subscribers only through the end of June. Send in your useless Bitcoins and I'll swap them for 5x of equivalent value in Zishcoin with zero transaction fees. Thanks. Back soon with more content. Here's the second coming of Chase Jenaro.
Give your poor grandmother a rest this Thanksgiving. Have a local Ethiopian restaurant cater the entire holiday dinner. Do you even enjoy turkey? Then why don't you cook one the other 364 days of the year? That's right, because chicken, beef, pork, and fish taste way better. And don't get me started on that stuffing nonsense. Tradition is lame. Try something new. Soledad Lomas did.
Erna O'Hara had a pair of Yeezys in her closet. I just couldn't resist. She says they are fine but prefers her Fila footwear. Erna, like so many her age, loves most things that are a throwback to the 90s. Personally, I also appreciate her nostalgia for the free-love, unshaven 60s. I blame my parents for letting me sleep on a waterbed throughout my adolescent years. Stay groovy.
I use my cameras to capture moments in time, because moments go in one direction, away. They are entirely irreplicable. The moment captured here with Diana Sedova and Victoria Minina was pure magic and is a big fuck-you to the lazy, fearful, loser parts of my personality. It is an important reminder that sometimes everything works out perfectly when you trust in the universe and grind. If I let my demons go unchecked, moments like this would never be possible. Break on through to the other side. And don't worry, this isn't the last that you will see of these incredible women.
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Nala Brooks has the kind of breasts that would make for a monumental tragedy if they were never displayed on camera. We walked around UT campus during the height of the pandemic. Most classes were relegated to remote learning, so Nala and I had minimal concern for spectators. Everyone was at home, scared and confused. I was still making smut because I have a mountain of student debt to pay off. It was a nice day outside.
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Comet Nox returns with her old cheerleading uniform from high school. She recently repurposed it as a Halloween costume. I can only hope that this is what the zombie apocalypse will look like. We visit her backyard where Comet kills it on the trampoline. She warned me that excessive bouncing has its affect on her bladder. I don't mind. Maybe others will, but maybe they need to get back in touch with nature.
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"Hey dudes. I'm giving you a soft one here. You can hate me as much as you want, but I think good photos of women are not only those with nudity. This is Reeson Gulbis. She's adorable and this day in Latvia was pretty damn close to perfect. More revealing stuff from this session to come."
"Luna Lovely is really cool. She's done a bunch of porn, but is special for the fact that she genuinely loves it. I also find her very attractive. Just remember, all the women you encounter these days have probably done dirty deeds in their pasts as well, and quite possibly on camera. There are no virgins left. Our technocracy has been screwing us since birth. Sorry, pal."
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This year has been tough, but we've made it through. Now for the next challenge. I must remind myself that truth is everything, fear is the adversary, and patience is just as crucial as initiative. I also want to stay away from gluten because it makes me feel like a wet towel, but that is a different topic. Anyways, I hope you fuckers are stubborn like me and continue to give the finger to the sadistic gods that want to break our spirits. Luna Fey has some good taste, or at least it isn't typical.
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Lila Love makes her Zishy debut with a playful and tempting dance to one of my recent favorite bands. Supposedly, King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard is being pushed hard by the YouTube algo. That's what my buddy says, anyways. I appreciate The Gizz because they take many chances creatively. Their music often feels like a throwback to more melodic times, but it can also be quite diverse and unpredictable. More Lila to come. She's an exceptionally fun hang and I got persistence.
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