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Damn, Zach. It is hella cool that you made this job for yourself. I go to work everyday, dreading existence. I have begun a gradual process of poisoning myself. As part of my daily routine, I take a dropper of hydrochloric acid and give my coffee a generous squirt. I started out only adding a drop or two, but over the past few weeks I have built up to a much higher dose. The tummy tingle is an oddly pleasant sensation. Anyways, let me know if you ever need an assistant or something, it could be a real gamechanger for me. If not, I totally understand. Perhaps you could at least introduce me to Maddie Crump. Thanks in advance. -George Tipcorn

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"I am currently at a popular tourist destination, dealing with long lines and high prices. It has brought me to the realization that I hate crowds. They are smelly, noisy, and full of disgusting strangers. The only redeeming aspect of crowds is the rare beautiful woman that can be found among them. An attractive female makes my tired life worth living. Evidently, some people even pay their hard earned munnies just to see photos of women on the internet. Bless your souls, my fellow space cowboys."

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"This girl from Mississippi just wants to have fun. Renee Wilson is a blast to photograph. When we met, it was late and there wasn't much around since we were far outside the city. How about this high school? There shouldn't be anyone around. Shooting in the dark is a challenge, but it helps when you have someone with Renee's energy. We made it work. This week proved to America that there aren't any blue states, only blue cities. Have a great weekend, don't break too many rules."

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Slava Konevs returns. She possesses the refined beauty of an emotionally mature woman, yet also exhibits the youthful charm of girl in her late teens. Slava has a very traditional side. She likes to cook for herself and her family. It is refreshing to meet people her age who find value in culture and tradition. Part 2 coming soon.

She is crazy beautiful and loves having attention thrown her way. That is the only reasoning I can come up with for these captured moments in time. Although this is a mostly-clothed set of Ira Sedina, I believe many of you will still be able to appreciate it. Moscow's Red Square is a marvel. There's no way to capture its magnitude from ground level. Don't hesitate if you get a chance to visit. And before you ask, no, I do not support anyone's war. It fucks with my travel plans. More Ira Sedina to come.

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"Our Moon is finally setting. I feel that she is at such a high caliber that a two-part finale is appropriate. We woke early on a rainy morning to capture these for you. I learned that day that there are many faces to the Moon. Most of them are quite thrilling. Xtra also to come."

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Please try not to view this set through a political lens. Disha and Alevtina are simply two young women trying to enjoy a few thrills before the planet melts into its nearest star. I am super grateful for the opportunity to travel the world and document beauty and adventure. You subscribers make all of this possible. Remember, no matter where you live, the people in power are lying to you. There is a better way, The New Way. More of this incredible pair to come.

Today, I bring you your second dose of Vonnie Bean. This one is a little more potent than the first, so you will want to monitor yourself for a half hour after consumption. Vonnie is truly adorable and you will see more of her here at Zishy if you stick around. But if you don't, I totally understand. I know many of you need to start saving up for the next big Jake PaulJustin Bieber extravaganza. Or maybe you are eying a brand new tent for that prime spot in the park. I get it.

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This remarkable woman is back to grace us with a new hair color. I just can't get over how photogenic Vonnie Bean's face is. I bet she could have won a few beauty pageants when she was growing up. I was also an adorable child. I worked the pageant circuit for a few seasons, but then I fell in love with Captain Crunch and those cheddar biscuits from Red Lobster. Extra pounds came on quick. Eventually, Mommy said my ass was too flabby for the little sailor outfit she made me. It broke my heart, but hey, beauty isn't everything. Anyways, enjoy Vonnie.

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Hi, everybody. This set of photos is another Zishy miracle. I was walking down the street with my ol' pal, Oxana, and we were in desperate need for a location to fit the stunning look she was sporting. We serendipitously found the Hotel Monika. It was everything we wanted colorful, elegant, plush. It even offered plenty of privacy, so much so that Oxana was able to play their piano, demonstrate her singing chops, and flash me glimpses of her immaculate body. You will see video from this day in Oxana's next update. Guess you will just have to stick around. I think you can manage.

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"Our contributor in Moscow comes through with another looker who isn't afraid of adventure. Meet Liana Rainer. I keep telling myself that I am going to get tired of these prime babes from Russia, but it just never happens. What gives? More Liana eventually."

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Every morning I wake up thinking that they found a cure or that it was all just a bad dream. But nope. This shit is real. I am getting older and there is nothing I can do about it. I know we are all in the same boat. Our hair is falling out or turning grey, wrinkles are forming across our faces, and we can only last a mere two and a half hours in bed with incredible women like Regan Budimir. Why is this happening to me? Why do I now require ten painful minutes to recharge instead of the standard five? My word. Is there any hope left? Science, I am in your hands now. Bring me Eternal Spring.

Tonight on Disney After Dark, our photographer takes Princess Sofi out for an adventurous spot of tea. The weather is cold but Sofi Levchenko is daring and eager to enchant. After meaningless chat, she leads us back to her apartment where Sofi removes her coat, boots, and everything underneath. She has an elegant figure only matched by her alluring face. Some fairy tales are real.

Max brings us another woman from Ukraine. Nyla Rox has done some nude modeling but I doubt anything like Zishy. I mostly tell contributors to avoid doing anything which seems typical for other sites. I want the stuff that falls through the cracks. I to see all the humanity and personality that gets in the way for other publications. We are collecting souls here. Ukraine Rox.

I like when I see thank-yous in the user comments. No no no, not towards me, but when the appreciation is directed at the model. Marie Boitte, just like all the women on here, has risked her reputation for our entertainment. People could see these photos, judge her, and proclaim that she has lost some value as a person. Every single family member of hers could view these photos. And they could exist online until the end of human civilization. Talk about some brave-ass women. And talk about some weak-ass, out-of-touch haters who can't accept reality. The reality that each of us is here because two people were horny and decided to fuck. So help me out this coming year. If you are reading this and have not subscribed, please strongly consider it. I really like paying these women as much as I can to endure society's hypocritical bullshit. Thanks.

Humans are awesome. They come in all different shapes and sizes. Mercedes Llano understands that she might not be everyone's favorite flavor, but she definitely has her niche. Imagine if you had to explain beauty to a Martian. And now imagine if everyone looked that way. Beauty would eventually become that which is not the norm. Keep it clean, this is the only rule.

Sage Hailong does some stripping to pay the bills. That's cool. I am a firm believer in the value of salesmanship. You must be able to sell yourself in this life or else you're basically screwed. The next time you step into a strip club, try to imagine you are walking into an office building, or better yet, a car dealership. Ignore the purplish light that smooths out the skin perfections. Ignore the scent of cheap strawberry perfume that masks the alcohol and body odor. Ignore the inspiring beat of the blaring Xhibit track which played on the radio twenty years ago. Check your ego at the door. You have now become a mark and these women are here to close. You will not be turning on any of these sharks, unless you intend to do so with your wallet.

It is that time of year. Break out the eggnog and chainsaw. We are going deep this holiday season. Trista Jakes got cozy around the most over-decorated Christmas tree I've ever seen. It was a frigid day in Dallas, but nothing her grandma's furnace couldn't handle. The best is blessed.

"Our contributor, Anthony, is back with Lady Noire in Portland. The pair went to the botanical garden and got exquisite photos of ducks and flowers. Noire forgot to wear underwear but I can't fault her for that. They would have been awkwardly visible under her tight beige dress. We wouldn't want that. The list of things to be thankful for grows everyday. Don't get stuck bitching about life."

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